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"One fallacy, I think, of anti piracy arguments is that a lot of them seem to assume that if I'm unable to pirate something I'm going to pay for it instead rather than going "oh! that's a terrible shame" and then quickly forgetting about it"

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i bought this book from the queer section of a bookstore in Reno, NV,
after reaading the synopsis; poetic, i know. a long unconventionally written character-driven inner monologue about heteronormativity and gender roles from a trans anarcha-queer is right up my alley. one of the first things you notice once beginning to read this book is that Imogen Binnie (the author) uses no quotation marks. all of the dialogue is basically told through Maria Griffith's own words (e.g. "You’re so fuckin’ hot, Steph says" from page 3) and it's an interesting but overall impactful choice. it makes it extremely easy to form a bond with Maria right off the bat. she works a shitty bookstore job in the heart of New York City, but the "call-to-action" of the plot happens after she quits her shitty job, steals her (ex-)girlfriend Steph's car, and takes it on a roadtrip with no set destination using her bottom surgery savings with no set destination. the majority of this book takes place through Maria's eyes. i say the majority because 1. we get a chapter from Steph in chapter 27, and 2. in the second half of the book, we meet a new character named James.

James is basically a spitting image of Maria pre-transition, and after meeting unexpectedly at a Walmart she makes it her mission to get him to realise he is trans. for a solid few days, because after getting him to come with her to some casino she... abandons him there. and the last line of the book is with James, wondering if theres enough room for him to get head in the back of his girlfriends car.

even though this book isn't some Fast and Furious-esque spy thriller, plot points come out of nowhere to the point of whiplash. Maria unexpectedly breaks up with her girlfriend, decides to go on this impromptu roadtrip, and abandons James all out of nowhere.

Binnie has stated that this book is essentially a book about someone who always makes the wrong choice, and is a kind of anti-narrative to the common "trans story" that's clearly meant for cis people. this book, in that regard, is perfect. i think one of the only things that i didn't like were Maria's antagonistic views on trans masculine people, who she views as having it "better." i dont think it should be taken out of the book or anything, as i think it adds depth to her character and gives us more insight on her relationship to the trans community. it's just kind of sucks having to read that as a masculine presenting trans person. other than that, this book was fantastic and absolutely a required queer read. bouts" doesn't exactly have the same ring to it (and not a lot of things rhyme with whereabouts anyways). Even though this song is inherently political, I do like how almost everyone can relate to this in an a-political way. Not everyone knows a Christo-facsist soldier, but everyone has a friend that they've lost touch with. Everyone has a friend they miss. The repetition of that last line, "it's alright," feels like a plea to this person.

The next verse doesn't have much to talk about on it's own, as it's mostly just more ways of saying what we already know by this point and serves as sort of a "flashback" than anything. Coupled with the pre-chorus, though, is where it gets interesting.

Another place, another time
We toed the same side of the line
Yeah, we saw eye to eye
Even then the saddest sounds
Were nothing laughter could not drown
But we are not laughing now

I see your face
In my sights
I hesitate
And then look for a sign
Somewhere in the sky

The juxtaposition between the two is stark; firstly, he talks about his brotherly comradery. Toeing the same line, seeing eye to eye, drowning their sorrows in laughter. The last line of the verse, though, brings us back to reality.

The protagonist looks down the sight of (assumedly) a sniper rifle, at a friend he once loved; hesitating

Chamber the Cartridge

Chamber the Cartridge immediately sets the artistic tone that persists throughout The Sufferer and the Witness. The song begins with some radio chatter, as Brandon Barnes plays this militant drum fill that gets faster as the introduction goes on. After a moment, you can hear a robotic voice announce "this is Noyes." The intro uses a sample from the Noyes station Chicago train line; not only a nod to their roots as a Chicago-based band, but a tongue-in-cheek self awareness that they are quite literally making noise
.

The first verses are spoken incredibly quickly. Which is, honestly, a little unfortunate given the amazing imagery that Tim McIlrath uses.

Down beyond these city streets through gutters filled with black debris
In alleys void of any light where nameless things live out of sight
Down through the scrapers of the sky past neon words glowing all night
Echoes my name between each car, "Are you happy where you are?"

He manages to make these lyrics come alive, like a camera is panning around this Gotham-esque city. He could've called them "neon signs," but instead he says "neon words glowing all night." He could've said "sky scraper," but instead he says "scraper of the sky." Which may sound like an immature and childish change, but I think it enhances this section a lot. At a first hearing, you don't really understand all of what he's saying. Unless you physically read the lyrics, he's just speaking too fast and aggresssive to understand it. That small change adds an air of mysticism to itself.

Injection

Injection blends together the themes of politics and personal strife into a wonderful concoction of desperation. The equivalent of watching someone trapped in a tank of water try and claw their way out.

The chorus is so fast-paced, and by the end Tim McIlrath is pleading to the listener:

Give me the drug, keep me alive
Give me what's left of my life
Don't let me go
Pull this plug, let me breath
On my own I'm finally free
Don't let me go

Ready to Fall

Ready to Fall, the first single and third overall track of the album, is so fucking catchy it's crazy. A soft riff begins and, after the first two measures, breaks out into the main part of the song. The first verse plays out as a conversation between two people, going something like this:

"Hold on slow down again from the top now, and tell me everything."

"I know I've been gone for what seems like forever, but I'm here now waiting. To convince you that I'm not a ghost or a stranger, but closer than you think."

She said, "just go on to what you pretend is your life, but please don't die on me!"

The pre-chorus and chorus tackles the narrators willingness to die, with lines like:

Wings won't take me
Heights don't faze me
So take a step
But don't look down
Take a step

Hinting that he's afraid to follow through, and other lines like:

I found a shoulder to lean on
An infallible reason to live all by itself
I took one last look from the heights that I once loved
And then I ran like hell

Indicating that he is scared to follow through.

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