2023
kurt cobain didn't wear dresses
kurt cobain didn't wear dresses
twisted sister isnt drag
freddy mercury wasnt queer
my idols can't be fags
frida kahlo couldn't have been bisexual
she's married to a man
columbus and the natives ate dinner together
and no blood was bled
rosa parks was "just tired"
at least, that's what the history books said
and no, they weren't lovers
just really. good. friends.
kurt cobain didn't wear dresses
because maybe, just maybe,
i would actually have to admit that
faggots can write songs
and the drag queens didn't trans my kids
and every MLK day i quote
a socialist who was more radical
than prager u would have you believe
but kurt cobain didn't wear dresses
// written on 19 september 2023
blues
am i a bad person?
the thought keeps me awake
into twilight
"if you're asking that
you probably aren't bad!"
that doesn't make me good
kleptomaniac blues
// written on 22 may 2023 🞟 mayday entry
co-dependant
anxiety tricks my mind
into thinking everyone hates me
and adhd
makes sure i'm not listening anyways
they're more in love
than i will ever be
—which doesn't say much
// written on 12 may 2023 🞟 mayday entry
butterflies
if you came looking
for a cocoon metaphor,
you have the wrong poet
my melancholic despair is not muddied
with a menagerie of meaningless words
my poems don't paint
lavish landscapes of love, and loss.
i am not Dickinson
i am not Silverstein
Shakespeare nor Homer
i am a lot of other things,
but mostly
i am a hypocrite
bring out the butterflies, baby
// written on 11 may 2023 🞟 mayday entry
title
klepto callings
of the easiest kind
pockets lined
with the crumbs of a candy bar
and several CDs
as i leave the store
a tag where my body once stood
// written on 10 may 2023 🞟 mayday entry
forgiveness
people tell me to forgive you
"blood is thicker than water"
i tried being understanding
i tried getting you help
i gave you time
and nothing seemed to change
so i blocked your number
and cut off ties
maybe someday i can find it in myself
to forgive you for what you've said
is it anytime soon?
maybe, maybe not
// written on 9 may 2023 🞟 mayday entry
eclipse
sheets of dark matter
speckled with stars,
and pillows of cosmic dust
i hide in them, with you
my own James Webb
loom over me,
as the sun to the moon,
and kiss me sweetly—
a total eclipse
// written on 8 may 2023 🞟 mayday entry
title
vines grow;
roots constrict my chest,
but they must
if im to truly bloom
// written on 7 may 2023 🞟 mayday entry
haunted
the ghosts of bay view
national guardsmen;
militia or gestapo?
only time tells
"ignore the Poles,
and their families too
tradesmen make good practice,
so just shoot to kill"
the milwaukee special
// written on 6 may 2023 🞟 mayday entry
spiralling
There
Is
Only
So many
Numericals in
The Fibonacci Sequence for
Me to use in this lazy poem that I've put no
Effort into whatsoever, but I've already committed to the bit... So there.
// written on 5 may 2023 🞟 mayday entry
overthinking
The fear of being forgotten.
The fear of death.
The fear that nothing will change.
The fear that my life will make no difference.
The fear that I will sit idly,
Watching the world get stripped from itself,
And be powerless to stop it.
The fear that what I do won't ever be enough.
The fear that every decision I make is the wrong one.
The fear of becoming everything I hate.
The fear of wasting away.
// written on 4 may 2023 🞟 mayday entry
extinction
oil rigs
toll and dig
"make it big!"
they told him long ago
balls go rolling
cargos falling
fuel's spilling
carbon outnumbers the air
seattle is underwater
be that it's no longer
a miniscule problem
solved with thread and tape
survivors plead
atop floating debris
swept to sea
as the needle makes its final stand
// written on 3 may 2023 🞟 mayday entry
united
"united we stand, divided we fall"
empty mantras
and emptier actions
liberalism; fake warmth
they tell us to behave
so i keep my cup on the coaster
and my elbows off the table
lest i be killed in the street
and discarded with the rest of the litter
trans girl murdered at 16
and no end in sight
it's no surprise
after all,
we are
but a preposterous ideology
// written on 2 may 2023 🞟 mayday entry
blackout
scratched lottery tickets
meet unopened bills
and a court date set in July
is pushed to the back of his mind
as he is swept up
in fireballs and gin
rings cast his table
from drinks, unaccounted;
blending days
blend harder
when blacking out becomes routine
// written on 1 may 2023 🞟 mayday entry
strobe
lights may lie
and love might be a nice cushion,
but angles and eyeliner
don't cover acne
and my other imperfections.
fickle are my choices
they stem from boys attention.
validate,
desecrate,
and build me from scratch.
pick a different face,
and a nicer ass.
dream of me
not as I may be,
but as you'd like me so.
// written on 9 april 2023